An educational Blog about Poo

Don’t tell me that this blog isn’t informative as well. Here I have compiled some facts about poo. Now you can feel assured that should you ever be in a situation where you need to know why your poo is normally brown, you will be prepared.

What is poo made of?
About 3/4 of your turd is water. Of course, this value is highly variable - the water content of diarrhoea is much higher, and the amount of water in poo that has been retained (voluntarily or otherwise) is lower. Water is absorbed out of faecal material as it passes through the intestine, so the longer a turd resides inside before emerging, the drier it will be.
Of the portion remaining, a third is dead bacteria. Another 1/3 of the turd mass is made of stuff that we find indigestible, like cellulose, for instance. The remaining portion of the turd is a mixture of fats such as cholesterol, inorganic salts like phosphates, live bacteria, dead cells and mucus from the lining of the intestine, and protein.

Why does poo stink?
Crap stinks as a result of bacterial action. Bacteria produce smelly, sulphur or nitrogen rich organic compounds such as the inorganic gas, hydrogen sulphide.

Why is poo brown?
When blood cells die, the red colour in them (which is called haemoglobin) is changed into yellow things(bilirubin). Your body gets rid of these in your wee (urine) and in your poo (brown). The yellow colour in wee is called urobilin, and the brown colour in poo is called stercobilin. You can see exactly the same thing happening if you have a bruise – the blood in your skin starts off red and then becomes yellowy/brown.

How come when you eat sweetcorn, no matter how much you chew it, you shit whole pieces back out?

When we chew sweetcorn, the outer coating slips off the inner kernel. This outer yellow coating is almost entirely cellulose, and is indigestible. It passes through the gut untouched, and emerges looking like a whole kernel, although it is mostly just the outer skin. The inside of the kernel is starchy and digestible, and that is the part that we succeed in chewing up.

Different ways to say you need to have a poo

Passing a stool (see picture to right)

Take a dump

Knock out a cripple

Drop the kids off at the swimming pool

Have a shit

I need a Betty (Betty Boo)

I’m going for a four by two

Gonna give birth to a chocolate log

Going to curl one down

Going for an Ertha Kitt

Going for a bob

Please feel free to add your own favourite sayings in the comments section

COMING SOON, The definitive collection of poo types.