After numerous complaints for cruelty to animals after using the original 'cut the bastard in half trap' I have devised on devising a safe trap. I Now understand that the mouse has the right to life and all that stuff and accept and previous gaff I may have made. The set up is as follows.
There is a piece of cheese strategically placed on the floor, I then have a video camera set up on infra red light which is linked to a pager which attaches to my pyjamas and goes bing bing should the camera be activated. I then read the display and I know we have mice alert.
I then have to quickly get to the doorway entrance to the kitchen to activate my safe mouse trap. It works like this.
I turn a crank which rotates a vertical gear, connected to a horizontal gear. As that gear turns, it pushes an elastic-loaded lever until it snaps back in place, hitting a swinging boot. This causes the boot to kick over a bucket, sending a marble down a zigzagging incline which feeds into a chute. This leads the marble to hit a vertical pole, at the top of which is an open hand, palm-up, which is supporting a larger ball . The movement of the pole knocks the ball free to fall through a hole in its platform into a bathtub, and then through a hole in the tub onto one end of a see-saw. This launches a diver on the other end into a tub which is on the same base as the barbed pole supporting the mouse cage. The movement of the tub shakes the cage free from the top of the pole and allows it to fall. This then lands on the mouse where I am able to collect the rodent at my own leisure.
I am then going to be even greener and save on plastic. I will then dissect the mouse and insert a marble in its back which will be carefully connected to some wires to create a contact point. This will then be wired via its tail to a USB interface which should connect directly to my computer. This new organic mouse could save on millions of tons of plastic a year and save the planet.
Can I place my order?
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